Open, allow, receive

Last night I was putting away a necklace and I noticed everything in my jewelry box was tangled. The size of this metal ball of knots had been slowly growing over the years, so I decided to face it head-on. Not many tasks are more tedious than taking the knots out of small, delicate chains that could break with one wrong turn.

Just blow it off, Jen.

I looked at the pile and saw about 6 necklaces, two bracelets, and a couple of rings. The thought of “getting all the knots out” seemed symbolic to me for some reason. Not because I’m obsessive-compulsive, but because we all have things that we put off. This particular thing was not a priority. But if I took the time to deal with it, perhaps some other things in my life might straighten out too. This became an exercise in alignment.

I got a pair of tweezers and my reading glasses, and went to town.  After ten minutes, my first necklace was released.

Sweet!

It was a gold chain with a cameo pendant that I haven’t worn in a long time – mainly because it was trapped in my jewelry box for about three years. I put it on my dresser in a straight line, and went back to the pile.

The next item to be untangled was a heart-shaped pendant I got while traveling in New York City. I remember feeling super nausious as I chose it in a case of an antique store in Midtown. I found out when I got home the reason I almost tossed my cookies was because I was pregnant with my son and didn’t know it.

I always loved that heart…

15 minutes went by and I’d successfully placed all of the items on my dresser untangled. I was pretty proud of myself for doing this so quickly, but when I looked down, there was a small bump on one of the chains. At first I tried to smooth it out.

No knot can be that small…

But when I got out my magnifying glass, I realized it was indeed the last knot in the jewelry box.

Dammit!

At first, I debated just throwing the necklace out. It was something I got when I was a teenager – a very thin chain I haven’t worn since I was 22. It didn’t have a pendant and I doubted I’d ever use it. But the thought of throwing it out felt like all the work I’d done on the previous chains would be for nothing. Either I get all the knots out or none of the knots. I decided that even if it took me hours, I would fix it.

The clock ticked as my neck and back felt the strain of being hunched over. I alternated between holding the chain and putting it on the vanity, tweezers in hand, picking and prodding. I tried several different angles, jaw clenching with each failure. I seemed to be making no progress at all, which made me try harder. The more frustrated I became the tighter I held the tweezers and the bigger the knot seemed to get.

And then it hit me.

Relax, Jen!

I had become a ball of tension curled up on my bathroom floor, and I was getting nowhere. I started to wonder what would happen if I completely gave up control of this situation and tried to shift my energy from one of pushing and forcing, to that of “opening, allowing, receiving…”

I loosened the grip in my hands and visualized light coming down into the room.

Open. Allow. Receive.

I looked at the clock and it was 11:11. I had been working on this one particular chain for 45 minutes.

Shit!

I took the tweezers and pictured them making progress in an instant, as if they were now a magic wand.

Just let it flow, Jen. Relax.

And then, the makings of a small circle started to form – a sign that the knot had actually come loose.

FINALLY!!

I extended the chain and checked it for damage, figuring the 45 minute struggle would have left a mark. To my surprise, it was perfectly fine. I looked at all the necklaces now lined up without any kinks or tangels, and felt a sense of accomplishment. I took the one in hand that caused me the most trouble, and smiled. It was the least attractive chain in the bunch, yet it now seemed to have the most significance. Rather than putting it back in my jewelry box, I put it on.

I just touched the necklace as I type this to remind me of this lesson.

Open, allow, receive.

Life comes with its fare share of knots. When we decide to “let go and let it flow,” we can get back to the smooth, untangled path we all deserve.